I would so love to go missing right about now. As many of you know my life is nuts I have a million things going on at once, but to add to the mix. I am now in the middle of starting another company, which at this point needs me. B.B.W is doing great, I know this is the right time to take a break and let others take over for me. Which frees me up to help my husband and his company they need some Computer help big time. So to add to the many hats I get to wear we can now add skip tracer LOL .. OK so this will be last blog for a while please know I love you all and will be back soon promise. Be well with love, Candi <3 XOXO
song for the time I am off will be Cynthia: Crying over you ( great song listen to it )

 I know I must be nuts to go shopping today but hey I love shopping. It is my bad habit.. What's yours ??????
Have a great day...
Be well with love <Candi
song for the day: Debbi Gibson: lost in your eyes ( love my 80"s music)

 I am breaking away from the kitchen to answer some emails and post my daily blog.... Wow it this over yet.. Crazy day lots to do. I just finished pie number 3 one more to go. My list today is a mile long. I guess one thing at a time...IT IS WHAT IT IS....
I hope everyone enjoys their day tomorrow, spend time with your family, be thankfully for what you have.I know this time can be hard on us but try to find the good in it....
I will try to find the good in it, with 22 hungry people in my house, Yes I feel like the soup kitchen LOL. I swear next year I am not cooking, and to think Christmas is right around the corner. I have to do this all over again..... OK be well with love,Candi
Song for the night: Maxwell:Pretty wings.( if you let go and it comes back it's yours, maybe not to keep but for the moment it is)

Today I am in a fog.....Life is crazy, it comes with lots of  ups and downs and turns and bumps in the road. I guess we just have to buckle up and enjoy the ride. what else can we do. Enjoy it when it's good and fight like hell when it's bad. Because if we never had anything bad happen to us we would never know the joys of the good.... Live life, love life and enjoy the good because the bad is never to far away.........
IT IS WHAT IT IS....<3
be well with love,Candi XOXO
song for the night:Leona Lewis : Happy
Quote for the night: Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take But by the number of moments that take our breath away.......

Today I had a great day, Judy and I took the boys to lego fest. I found a great bracelet it has wings and a angel on it, Buying this made me remember how much I miss my baby girl a simple thing like a bracelet with wings made me miss her even more.
Kats birthday will be  here before I know it. Jan,4 will be 10 years with out her. without holding her...... I can't tell you how much I dislike the holidays, I put on a happy face and smile, and make believe everything is OK. When inside I am dieing without her This has to be the hardest part for me, the pain never goes away we just learn to fake it...
In 1999 right before Thanksgiving I found out how sick she was. I was only 19 and had to handle all this on my own. Knowing  that I am her Mother and my job was to keep her safe,Protect her from
any harm and I failed to do that kills me everyday. I live with that guilt,,, My body made her sick, and didn't give her everything she needed. It is very hard not to blame yourself. I know they (the doctors) told me their was nothing I could have done for her. But as a Mom I don't feel  that way their must have been something...
We take for granted the simple things in life, like buying a bracelet and for anyone else it would have been a easy thing to do, But for a Mom with a baby with wings, this simple bracelet
reminds me of what I am missing..As my house fills this Thanksgiving with friends and family members and every year seems to get bigger I think we are up too 22 last time I counted, Their will always be someone missing, I will like every year that passes be in the kitchen cooking away, I have to keep busy or I will break down.... Please take the time to enjoy the simple things, A hug from your kids or a lego mess in the living room.
You really never know what tomorrow will bring you, Be thankful you have today,and live for that..Please know I will be praying for all of you as I know how hard the holidays can be..
Be well with love,Candi xoxo

Song for the night: Kelly Clarkson - Does He Love You (Duet With Reba Mcentire) Lyrics
I've known about you for a while now
When he leaves me he wears a smile now
As soon as he's away from me
In your arms is where he wants to be

But you're the one he rushes home to
You're the one he gave his name to
I'll never see his face in the early morning light
You have his mornings, his daytimes
And sometimes I have his nights

But does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he loves me (Like he loves me)
Does he think of you (Does he think of you)
When he's holding me
And does he whisper (Does he whisper)
All his fantasies
Does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he's been loving me

But when he's with me
He says he needs me
And that he wants me
That he believes in me

And when I'm in his arms
Oh he swears there's no one else
Is he deceiving me
Or am I deceiving myself
(Am I deceiving myself)

Both:
But does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he loves me (Like he loves me)
Does he think of you (Does he think of you)
When he's holding me
And does he whisper (Does he whisper)
All his fantasies
Does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he's been loving me

Reba:
Oh shouldn't I lose my temper

Kelly:
Oh and shouldn't I be ashamed

Reba:
Cuz I have everything to lose

Kelly:
And I, I have nothing to gain

Both:
But does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he loves me (Like he loves me)
Does he think of you (Does he think of you)
When he's holding me
And does he whisper (Does he whisper)
All his fantasies
Does he love you (Does he love you)
Like he's been loving me

Reba:
Oh does he love you 

Today I broke down and gave in Yes I got a new cell phone and OMG it is a blackberry..... I know I never wanted one BUT I guess now I need one.... With all the things going on in my life I had to get one, Well when my laptop broke down and still will not turn on, I have to have online access, With all the emails I get with in a day it just made since to get one.... So I am now up to date with the technology LOL.... welcome to the year 2009, I just miss the simple times when I just needed a  pager and if I wanted to I could call you back but now that is not an option, Well have a great night .
Be well with love,Candi
And I ask how was your day???
Song for the night: Taylor Swift You belong with me

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, She's upset
She's going off about something that you said
She doesnt get your humour like I do

I'm in the room, its a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesnt like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts
She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming bout the day when you'll wake up and find
That what you're lookin for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can't you see?
You belong with me
You belong with me

Walkin the streets with you in your worn out jeans
I cant help thinking this is how it ought to be
Laughing on the park bench thinkin to myself
Hey isnt this easy?

And you've got a smile that could light up this whole town
I havent seen it in awhile, since she brought you down
You say you find I know you better than that
Hey, Whatcha doing with a girl like that?

She wears high heels, I wear sneakers
She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming bout the day when you'll wake up and find
That what you're looking for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standin by, waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know that?
You belong with me
You belong with me

Oh I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're about to cry
I know your favorite songs and you tell me about your dreams
I think I know where you belong. I think I know it's with me.

Can't you see that I'm the one who understand you?
Been here all along so why can't you see?
You belong with me

Standing by or waiting at your back door
All this time how could you not know that
You belong with me
You belong with me

Have you ever thought just maybe
You belong with me
You belong with me

Some times I stuff everything into my closets, Not wanting to deal.... Life is not easy and when it gets really hard on me I will push everything away right into my closets. Well today I stopped and took a look and my closet is about too burst open and spill all over the floor. So I am cleaning it out getting rid of all the B.S. I don't need to deal with anymore.. All the junk that is thrown my way to handle I am letting go of it.. For years now I have always done the right thing followed all the rules and if you know me I am a rule breaker, I deal with the problems of everyone around me,( like I am their crazy glue). I never take the time to handle my own issues they get pushed into my closet. So today I am stopping all of it and pulling out the trash bags and CLEAN OUT MY SHIT.....  I think we should all remember that YOU MUST come first. I am so use to doing everything for everyone and putting me last. Today is a new day and a new Candace, I will no longer sit back while the world dumps their issues on me..
Me first for once.... and to tell you the truth I DON"T FEEL A BIT BAD DOING IT............IT IS WHAT IT IS lol
again I am ending this blog by simply saying have a great night...
Be well with love Candi xoxo
song for the night :David Guetta and Akon  Sexy Chick ( I think they wrote this song about me LOL)

Yes I can see her
Cause every girl in here wanna be her
Oh she's a diva
I feel the same and I wanna meet her

They say she low down
It's just a rumor and I don't believe em
They say she needs to slow down
The baddest thing around town

She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before
Nothing you can compare to your neighbourhood
I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful
The way that booty movin I can't take no more
Have to stop what I'm doin so I can pull up close
I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

Damn girl
Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy bitch
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam girl

Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy chick
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam girl

Yes I can see her
Cause every girl in here wonna be her
Oh she's a diva
I feel the same and I wonna meet her

They say she low down
It's just a rumor and I don't believe em
They say she needs to slow down
The baddest thing around town

She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before
Nothing you can compare to your neighbourhood hoe
I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful
The way that booty movin I can't take no more
Have to stop what I'm doin so I can pull up close
I'm tryna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

Dam girl
Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy bitch
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam girl

Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy bitch
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam girl

Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy bitch
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam girl

Dam you'se a sexy chick
A sexy bitch
Dam you'se a sexy chick
Dam you'se a sexy chick

IT IS  WHAT  IT IS..................
I would end this blog with my usual And I ask how was your day?? But a little fly on my wall LOL told me to stop being so open. So tonight I will say.
Have a wonderful night .
Think about these saying tonight ""Your words are the most valuable tools you have." Think about how you use them.....
All my mistakes in life were when I said yes when I should have said no.....
Be well with love, Candi xoxo
Song for the night: Kelly Clarkson
Never Again"
I hope the ring you gave to her turns her finger green
I hope when your in bed with her, you think of me
I would never wish bad things, but I don't wish you well
Could you tell, by the flames that burned your words

I never read your letter
'Cos I knew what you'd say
Give me that Sunday school answer
Try and make it all OK

[Chorus]
Does it hurt to know I'll never be there
Bet it sucks, to see my face everywhere
It was you, who chose to end it like you did
I was the last to know
You knew exactly what you would do
And don't say, you simply lost your way
She may believe you but I never will
Never again

If she really knows the truth, she deserves you
A trophy wife, oh how cute
Ignorance is bliss
But when your day comes, and he's through with you
And he'll be through with you
You'll die together but alone

You wrote me in a letter
You couldn't say it right to my face
Give me that Sunday school answer
Repent yourself away

[Chorus]
Does it hurt to know I'll never be there
Bet it sucks, to see my face everywhere
It was you, who chose to end it like you did
I was the last to know
You knew exactly what you would do
And don't say, you simply lost your way
They may believe you but I never will
Never again

[Bridge]
Never again will I hear you
Never again will I miss you
Never again will I fall to you
Never

Never again will I kiss you
Never again will I want to
Never again will I love you
Never

[Chorus]
Does it hurt to know I'll never be there
Bet it sucks, to see my face everywhere
It was you, who chose to end it like you did
I was the last to know
You knew exactly what you would do
And don't say, you simply lost your way
They may believe you but I never will
I never will
I never will

Never again

I am taking a few days off, I need to clear my head and just find peace again... I will be checking my emails so if you need me I will be here. But I will not be blogging for a few.. Please know I will be praying for all of you and for me.. My head is spinning so fast it hurts   :(
Be well with love, Candi xoxo
Song for the night: Rihanna Russian Roulette
Take a Breathe, take a deal
Calm yourself, he says to me
If you play, you play for keeps
Take the gun and count to three
You're sweating now, moving slow
No time to think, my turn to go

And you can see my heart.. beating
You can see it through my chest
I'm terrified, but I'm not leaving
I know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger.....

Say a prayer to yourself
He says close your eyes, sometimes it helps
And then I get a scary thought
That he's here, means he's never lost

And you can see my heart.. beating
You can see it through my chest
I'm terrified, but I'm not leaving
I know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger.....

As my life flashes before my eyes
I'm wondering if I will ever see another sunrise
So many won't get the chance to say goodbye
But it's to late to think of the value of my life

And you can see my heart.. beating
You can see it through my chest
I'm terrified, but I'm not leaving
I know that I must pass this test
So just pull the trigger.....